I am fading away,
Drained of energy, weak,
The sky above me hangs heavy, a burden of gray,
Depression seeping into my bones.

I approach the rooms,
Each one accessible, except the first,
But I enter nonetheless.

Inside, a group sits around a hot pot,
Including his wife,
They invite me to join,
Their eyes brimming with sympathy.

Silent and motionless,
I make my way to the bed,
Seeking solace and rest.

As I almost lie down,
My upper body tilts at an angle,
Both hands pulling the blanket over me,
His eyes, wide open, fixated on mine.

In a startle, he springs up,
Leaping off the bed,
His wife approaches, urging him to be kind.

I am dying.

The beating of my heart remains,
Though subdued from the intensity,
When we clandestinely dated behind his wife.

His wife requests him to gather green beans,
On this rainy day.

I am dying, the certainty looms,
Hope and passion slipping away,
Yet, bravery blossoms within.

I no longer care if his wife discovers us,
For I am dying.

Unable to walk, unable to stand,
I teeter on the brink of collapse,
Putting a finger to my nose,
Testing for any sign of breath.

Everyone yields, allowing me to go first,
Their eyes filled with pity.

Hair falls, one by one,
Onto my palms, onto my chest,
Black strands, short and fleeting.

My friends, family, acquaintances,
Stand opposite me,
Including him,
Holding a bamboo basket brimming with green beans,
Water trickling from it.

They prepare to bid me farewell,
Their suffering will outlast mine,
Though not as deeply felt.

After I depart,
They will display sorrow,
Or perhaps their sadness will be genuine.

I step into the rain,
Across a slippery, muddy road,
Telling myself to be strong,
To keep walking.

My legs tremble, yet remain upright,
Two flat rocks obstruct my path,
Leaving a narrow passage.

I bend down, gripping the edge of a rock,
Carefully and resolutely,
Stepping onto the other side.

I cross the threshold,
Leaving behind those who watch me,
Anticipating my stumble,
Ready to rush to my aid,
To carry me away,
To remember me and bury me.

I continue walking,
Moving farther away,
From my people,
From everything I’ve known.

I walk,
In the rain,
Under the weight of the leaden sky,
I walk,
Moving forward,
With each step,
My legs growing stronger,
As I walk,
Persisting.